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Micki Pistorius

Fatal Females

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    In general, little distinction was made in early criminological literature on women between criminality and unchastity – the female thief and prostitute tended to be grouped together as one’ (Zedner, 1991)
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    when they are not taught to consider the consequences of their decisions, they are not equipped with the life skills needed to face adulthood
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    Teenagers who elect to make adult decisions have to take full adult responsibility for those decisions
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    Women need to acquire a sense of self-respect that ensures that they do not tolerate abuse from anyone
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    One needs to love oneself first in order to accomplish this, and to trust one’s inherent inner strength to succeed
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    Loving is not just about giving and serving, it is also about receiving respect as an autonomous human being
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    Women need to learn their value as human beings when they are still little girls. They are not the objects of men, they can exert control over their own lives and even if they are abused, they have the internal power to regain that control
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    Only an immature personality would attribute romance and adventure to a Bonnie and Clyde lifestyle
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    Intergenerational transmission of violence’ refers to the concept that children exposed to certain behavioural patterns of their parents will learn this to be the norm and will practise similar behaviour in adulthood
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    any of these signs are detected, it is imperative that the relationship be ended immediately
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    placing all responsibility for maintaining the relationship on the woman and expecting her to ‘save’ him from bad behaviour
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    refusing to take responsibility for his actions and blaming the woman for anything that may go wrong
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    rewarding or punishing her depending on how acceptable her behaviour is to him
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    behaviour aimed at controlling
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    Studies have proved that the longer an abusive relationship continues, the more difficult it is for the woman to leave. Warning signs that a relationship is doomed to develop into an abusive one, which may very well end in tragedy, include the following
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    He believes that he is entitled to abuse his partner and will pass the blame on to her, arguing that if she had ‘behaved’ herself, according to his rules, he would not have had to punish her. The burden of trying to make the relationship work is left entirely to the woman.
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    An abusive man does not recognise that he has a problem and will not readily agree to therapy
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    and Reconciliation in Johannesburg, profiles abusive men as ordinary individuals who harbour ‘traditional’ expectations of their partners. Most of their friends and acquaintances would not identify them as wife-beaters. These men deal with stress through violence. Any deviation by their partner from the traditional ‘ideal woman’ notion will be punished with violence and humiliation. They are also possessive and obsessively jealous, often accusing the woman, without any justification, of being unfaithful. Even looking at or speaking to another man is inexcusable. This kind of jealousy should not be regarded as a sign of his love for the woman. It is pathological behaviour and a way of exerting control over the woman
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    Any person who has an interest in the victim’s life, including counsellors, health workers, policemen, social workers and teachers, may also obtain protection orders against the abuser
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    South Africa implemented the Domestic Violence Act in 1999. This act offers spouses, partners involved in live-in as well as dating relationships, parents, the elderly and children, protection against physical, verbal, sexual, emotional, psychological and financial abuse, as well as against intimidation, harassment, damage to property and stalking
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