Saxon James

The annoying part of being a dumbass is that when I think I’m making good decisions, I’m really, really not.

I pick up the phone again and stare at the dick some supposedly nice guy sent me. Yeah, this might be a big deal.
It literally had in his profile I’ll treat you nice. He got a simple hi from me, and then bam, there it is. I think we have different definitions of nice.

Richie: Don’t get too philosophical on me. It hurts my brain. Maybe I am a turkey.
Einstein: At least you know not to look up at the sky when it’s raining. Your spirit animal should be one step higher than drowning turkey.
Richie: That’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me.

Jacobs’s voice comes from up ahead. “Cohen, since when were you wearing a scarf?”
Richie shrugs. “Thought it looked good.”
Beck immediately jumps in. “Hey, did you see that bird? Oops, it’s gone now. Also, did you know that jelly beans are covered in shellac which is made from bug shit? You’re welcome.”

Beck’s voice follows me. “What happens in Montreal, stays in Montreal.”
I glance back at him just in time to see him point at me.
“Except STDs. So don’t forget to wrap your shit.”

He kisses me so hard I can barely breathe, but then his cock is lined up with mine and his hand is around us both, and suddenly breathing seems like a minor thing.
Because this is heaven.

“It’s hot when you do it. I’m scared I’ll gag.”
“Pretend it’s a protein shake with kale. If I can swallow that, I can swallow anything.”
“That should go on your resume.”
“What type of job do you think I’m looking for?”

“You’re looking a bit uncomfortable over there.”
“My dick hurts.”
Seth laughs. “You should see someone about that.”
“It just needs some attention.”
“It is totally shocking that your cock is an attention whore.”
“It wants love.”
Seth reaches over and rubs the bulge in my pants. “I’ll make sure to find it a good home.”

But do you know why I like it when you come on me so much?”
“Because I am a sex god, and my man juice should be worshiped?”
“Please don’t ever say man juice ever again or I may never get a boner around you.”

“You okay?” Seth asks when we grab our bags.
“Yep. Just … long drive.”
“You weren’t the one driving.” He chuckles.
“What can I say, looking this good doing nothing is exhausting.”
Seth cups my cheek. “But you do it so well.”
“I know, right?”