Start with No: The Negotiating Tools That the Pros Don't Want You to Know

Interrogative-led questions drive vision.
Nurture.
No assumptions. No expectations. Only blank slate.
Who are the decision makers? Do you know all

three times (using 3 + ) .
The clearer the picture of pain, the easier the decision-making process.
The value of the negotiation increases by multiples as time, energy, money, and emotion are spent.
No talking.
Let the adversary save face at all times.
The greatest presentation you will ever give is the one your adversary will never see.
A negotiation is only over when we want it to be over.
"No" is good, "yes" is bad, "maybe" is worse.
Absolutely no closing.
Dance with the tiger.
Our greatest strength is our greatest weakness (Emerson).
Paint the pain.
Mission and purpose drive everything.
Decisions

Mission and purpose must be set in the adversary's world; our world must be secondary.
Spend maximum time on payside activity and minimum time on nonpayside activity.
You do not need it. You only want it.
No saving. You cannot save the adversary.
Only one person in a negotiation can feel okay. That person is the adversary.
All action—all decision—begins with vision. Without vision, there is no action.
Always show respect to the blocker.
All agreements must be clarified point by point and sealed

Never, ever, spill your beans in the lobby—or anywhere else.
Never enter a negotiation—never make a phone call—without a valid agenda.
The only valid goals are those you can control: behavior and activity

Every negotiation is an agreement between two or more parties with all parties having the right to veto—the right to say "no."
Your job is not to be liked. It is to be respected and effective.
Results are not valid goals.
Money has nothing to do with a valid mission and purpose

months, it could be longer. It depends on how hard

That may also be asking too much without training. How long before you feel a lot more comfortable than you may feel right now? You could reach that level within a couple of months—if you're a genius at this. It could be six months, it could be longer

So how long before you're relatively comfortable

Fifth, you don't make a phone call, you don't write an e-mail, without writing down an agenda for that phone call or e-mail

Fourth, you make certain you're dealing with the real decision makers